31 Jan 2012

Global English!

Now say after me with rounded lips,

The schwas and aitches in the proper way,

Make sure you stick to established standards,

And never make a mistake, never do it.

English is ours and we’ll tell you all

Exactly how to use it and teach it to all,

We have scholars like you can never have

And it is our language, in case you forgot.

You foolish good-for-not-a-things

You thought we let you have an English of your own?

Ha! The thought of it. Beware, don’t usurp

What is only ours. We stand all, hand-in-glove

And attempt to sell to you what we think

Is best for you. Do you have any idea

About how to go about it, without our holding you by the hand
And letting you see the marvels of our land and tongue?

No comments: